I’m going to be frank, and probably harsh. We’re all massive cliches, whether we like it or not. Life is predictable. And life is really, really sad. That’s why I find it hard to watch a lot of films, because whether it says they’re based on a true story or not, I know that it’s happened somewhere. The world wears a coat of sadness.
But what I’m getting round to is that I wouldn’t change a thing about my life. Which sounds dramatic, also a cliche, but I’ve thought it through for a long time, and I overthink everything, down to the very last speck of dust on the problem. I wouldn’t go back in time and change stuff, not even the tiny things like making the wrong face and accidentally upsetting someone. I wouldn’t change anything.
Which is really strange. Let’s go in deeper here. What I’m saying now, is that I wouldn’t change the voice in my head that tells me I shouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t change the horrible things I think about myself, and I wouldn’t change the way other people have treated me. I wouldn’t change a single damn thing.
I guess maybe because without that shit I wouldn’t be here. But even if I could change all that without changing a thing about myself now, I wouldn’t do it.
Call me weird, but I’m used to that. And maybe that picture above sums it all up. There’s only one thing wrong with what it says. Which is that it’s possible to let your demons go. That’s wrong, because they’re a part of you. It would be like chopping off your arm. You have to make friends with them, and maybe then they’ll shut up and be nice. But I’m not qualified to preach. I still haven’t tamed mine.
In the end, your demons are like the grim reaper. Everybody hates him, but why do they hate him? Because he comes with death? Do you only hate him because of what his arrival on the scene means? He walks with you to where you’re going. That’s actually really nice. Can you imagine doing that on your own? You wouldn’t have a damn clue. Not one. So re-think your opinion of the grim reaper, and then think about how you can relate that to your demons.
Over and out, for now…